Larry was the kind of guy who had a pretty tame reputation. Quiet, polite, and a little too obsessed with spreadsheets—as expected from a Chartered Accountant. But one Friday night, something unusual happened. Larry stumbled into the house well past midnight, whistling a suspiciously cheerful tune and grinning from ear to ear.
His wife, Linda, was waiting in the living room with her arms crossed and one eyebrow raised high enough to touch the ceiling.
“Where the hell have you been?” she demanded, tapping her foot like a ticking time bomb.
Larry blinked, still slightly buzzed on adrenaline—and maybe tequila—and replied proudly, “I was out… getting a tattoo!”
“A tattoo?” Linda’s jaw dropped. “You? Mr. Tax Deduction? You got a tattoo?”
He nodded enthusiastically.
Her eyes narrowed. “Okay, smart guy. What kind of tattoo?”
Larry puffed out his chest and grinned. “A hundred dollar bill. On my privates.”
Linda blinked.
Once. Twice.
And then the storm came. “What the actual hell is wrong with you? Why would anyone, especially a Chartered Accountant, tattoo a hundred dollar bill on that?!”
Without missing a beat, Larry held up one finger. “Let me explain.”
He started counting on his fingers.
“One,” he said confidently, “I like to watch my money grow.”
“Two,” he added with a wink, “once in a while, I like to play with my money.”
“Three,” he grinned, “I just enjoy the feel of cold, hard cash in my hand.”
Linda was already regretting asking.
But then he leaned in for the grand finale, lowering his voice dramatically.
“And four,” he said with a devilish smirk, “instead of going out shopping every weekend, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want.”
The room went silent.
Linda stared at him, stunned.
Then, without a word, she turned around, walked into the kitchen… and poured herself a drink.
Because honestly, how do you argue with that level of financial planning?
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